today was a very bad day and i would really appreciate it if everyone would just be really nice to me tonight
We asked twenty strangers to kiss for the first time….
This guy knows his shit on how to kiss a girl.
Artist & Illustrator:
"Moleskine pt. ii"
if you see someone use trans* instead of trans
thats usually a bad sign
sorry, but why?
i thought it just means that you’re acknowledging that there are people who are often grouped under the “trans umbrella” but who don’t necessarily identify as “trans” per se, for any number of reasons
that’s the only way I’ve seen it used, anyway
i mean a brief google search is telling me that the basic argument against it is similar to the bisexual/pansexual debate— that people who are against it don’t want transfolk to be treated as special separate groups, and that we should be fighting to make existing terms inclusive instead of making new terms
but uh, correct me if I’m wrong, but if a nonbinary person doesn’t actually feel like the word “trans” adequately describes them and therefore asks for an inclusivity indicator such as the asterix to be used, wouldn’t… ignoring that and telling them “no you’re wrong ‘trans’ DOES include you” be identity policing/erasure?
or am i just behind in the times as far as this issue goes??
the * is a bad sign because “trans” is already an umbrella term— one that was originally coined by trans women. people looked at amab people who fell under the trans umbrella and went “yeah, like that, but MORE INCLUSIVE” and completely missed the point. it’s another form of subtle transmisogyny where trans women have made something and their work is ignored.
that’s my half-remembered understanding of it?? i’ll do some more research and see if i can find a better explanation by someone else
I’m going through Dialectical Behavioral Therapy right now at a place downtown and each of us has to have this DBT skills workbook, You Untangled: Practical Tools To Manage Your Emotions And Improve Your Life. It’s basically just a series of chapters on different DBT skills, how they work, and how to use them. DBT was developed to treat BPD, and this book is written specifically for people who have a BPD diagnosis and using DBT vocabulary, but I think it’s pretty useful for anybody looking to have a little bit more understanding of themselves.
I started going through the section right now about maintaining healthy relationships (in hopes of getting some insight in how to go about coming out to my parents). Most of it is just self-reflective questions about goals & relationships, and just going through them is really helpful to me so I figured I’d type them all up just in case someone else finds them useful, too. These things are most effective if you fill them out without judgement, take what you think is useful to you and leave behind things that aren’t.
This isn’t a full transcript of the book— there are paragraphs between sections about mindfulness and some things to keep in mind while going through them, but I don’t have time to type them out right now. If anyone’s interested, sometime I could go through and make scans of each page, but for now, here’s just the questions.