im going to tentatively make a post about this b/c ive asked at least one person for advice on this but i feel like maybe other people could also give me advice. its about gay girl stuff

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tonight i went out to westport w/ mike to celebrate his birthday and we walked there, because we both wanted to drink and im al,pst oit of ags and its only like tenn bmintues away aand its super nice out so like why not

and on the way back we passed by the blarney stone- a sort of dive bar a block from the apartment that mainly cators to tpartons who are either punks or older dudes. there were a few people standing outside, like usual for a friday night, but some dude was staring at us really really hard. i actively refused to look at him (i was talking to mike and generally my rule of thumb with dudes being aggressive at me when i am walking home late at night is to Not Engage) but he had really aggressive body language and as we got within two feet of him he started singing???

i didn’t listen to what he was saying but mike said he was singing something about homos. he thought that me and mike were gay boys and he was mad about it. even though i am wearing a tiny plaid skirt. he definitely wanted to start a fight with us because he was mad about us holding hands. im glad neither of us engaged but what a hilarious and strangely wonderful occurrence. stay frosty, aggressive homophobe

gender/feelings update—

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ive been sick since yesterday and i just feel miserable and i worked 7 hours today followed by 2 hours of driving around kansas city trying to find a target and then subsequently finding the mysteriously hidden toilet paper within said target and i’m fuckin exhausted

i also took out my septum ring yesterday because i was sniffly and disgusting and didn’t try to put one back in until today and it won’t fit. i’m trying to figure out whether its worth it to try and stretch the thing back up myself (im trying now and it’s really not fun, but the piercing place that has helped me do this kind of thing in the past and that originally did my septum/labret is now closed) or just give up and not have a septum piercing anymore, since i don’t want/can’t afford to get it re pierced.

i also have to be awake in 9 hours for another work shift tomorrow morning, after which i have to clean my room and empty my closet and do laundry in preparation of the exterminator coming to finally get rid of these goddamn bedbugs that we’ve had for literally a month

i’m feeling pretty bad all around tbh. not a good day and i’m already feeling kind of down about myself and anxious about school starting so im just. kinda fallin apart here. falls into bed

I am about to say something very opinionated and rude so if you’re easily offended don’t read


Demigender isn’t a real thing. As someone who struggles with actual dysphoria and real gender issues, it’s almost insulting to hear someone that’s like ‘I feel apathetic toward my gender’. Then you’re a fucking cis person that doesn’t give a fuck about gender roles. And honestly I have so much more respect for people that just outright say ‘I’m cis but fuck the haters I do what I want’ than someone who tries to be a special snowflake by inventing a gender.

I am putting this in the Demingirl, Demiboy, and Demigender tags in hopes that someone may change my mind. If it is explained to me in a way that doesn’t sound like an imaginary thing that a 14 year old came up with because they were feeling oppressed, I may have a change of heart. But right now it seems as useless as Bunny pronouns. But that is a different rant post for a different day.

i’m responding to this because you asked for responses, so here you go:

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im creepin through that person’s selfies and trying not to faint. they look like if scarlett johanssen and miley cyrus had a very strong child……

so today i got an email saying jacqueline chanda, the president of kcai, decided to resign? i’m not sure what this means for students or why it happened. i remember earlier this year she got a vote of “no confidence” from the board at the school but i’m not sure what that means either. i’m nervous about what’s going on and why and i wish they would give us more information about what’s happening at our school.

like, really, what kind of criteria can you come up with for who gets to qualify as Real Trans that isn’t like, really fucked up and incomplete and not compatible with peoples actual experiences

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i included some references to fight club in my last essay for my Western Thoughts On Death & Dying class this summer and im a little bit surprised that it wasnt on the recommended reading list b/c a lot of it deals w/ death and anti-consumerism

i havent really studied it or read what other people have said about it who HAVE studied it but i think it has a lot of interesting things to say. i dunno what real viable conclusions it ends up with other than “consumerism is bad” because obviously tyler durden’s conclusion of “blow up everything and live in the woods like Ye Olden Times” isnt really a viable one for the world at large, but maybe it doesn’t really try any harder than that, i dunno. i should probably reread it, i haven’t read it in a really long time

like bronies would be really cool if they were more like “wow, a cool show for little girls! awesome! it’s all about friendship and solving problems without being shitty to anyone. little girls are rad and it’s good shows like this exist for them. ” and not “let me focus my entire interest in this show on how much i want to fuck that horse. also little girls are shit and they can get out because this is mine now.”